You're still my favourite melody ♥
Jeremy Kevin Mathews
14 June 1994 ( 17 )
Swimmer
(Aquatic Performance Swim Club)
Student
wish you would step back from that ledge my friend~
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Dear friend, Remember how we were unseperable, or at least it seemed that way, when we talked to each other almost everytime we could.Remember how we just had to rebutt each other or make what each other said seem wrong. Just for the sake of doing it.Remember how we called each other the weirdest of names- how you were stupid and I was smart.Remember how we tried to act like we dislike each other, but yet we just never seemed to do it, simply because we didnt. Because you were special. Remember how we had planned to do so many things together, things to do for each other. But they just never came to pass. Im sorry that I messed up.Im sorry for what I said that hurt real bad.Im sorry for pretending not to notice, when I looked into your eyes that spoke of how much you were hurting because of what I did. Im sorry that I spoilt the something special that we once shared. Im sorry that I can never be her. Im sorry for never answering all the questions you've asked me. But it is a yes to most of them. The ones where you were serious and I thought you were kidding. Yes, dearie. Im sorry that I hurt you in a way I never really meant to. I dont even know WHY I did what I did, seriously. But as people say "sorry wont cure". I dont even know if you will see this, or even if you do whether you would realise it is you Im talking about. But, I have to say, I am really terribly sorry for what happened that day. I dont know what got over me, really, jealousy, fear, hurt, maybe. As much as I wanted to apologise, I didnt cause of my pride. You did though it wasnt your fault, and all the more it pains me. During the past few/many months when we didnt keep in contact, so many things happened. And I'm glad for you, that you've been doing well in your sports, in school, in your life. But sorry that I wasnt there to be happy with you. And how it makes me feel terrible after all you would be there for me 24/7 (or at least you tried). You knew when I was down, and you would do anything so long as I was happy. But what did I do for you? All the food (haha), and trying to be there for you as much as I could and yeah stuff maybe, but with that one incident that spoilt everything, all the things that I did for you dont count anymore. To ask for us to go back to where we were is probably too much. After all, you do deserve someone better.I have a lot of things I want to say, but I guess, I just dont know how to. After having shoved you all the way to the back of mind these few months, trying not to think about you, about us. Just seeing someone that looked like you and shared a similar name, brought out everything that I had tried not to think about.I've missed the way you make me smile with every sms, every call, every convo. I've missed the way you are so retarded and lame. I've missed our daily routine.I've missed seeing your name flash up on the taskbar.I've missed the feeling of receiving an sms, knowing it would be you.I've missed you, friend.
I realised that I keep comparing, I keep reminiscing- how we used to do this, used to do that, and how I was never able to let go because one part of me just refused to saying you never know what could have happened if you dont wait, afterall there are maybes. But for how long can I hold on, its been over a year now and Im tired, really. Tired of wishing, hoping and waiting. Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.-Herman Hesse"Forget the former things;do not dwell on the past."Isaiah 43:18"But one thing that I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead"Philippians 3:13You're probably not coming back now. The maybes that made me hold on so long will probably never come true. The reality of it all, has nullified all that made me believe that you meant that one single sentence from you that made me hold on this long. Let go and let God. Let God take over, realign my priorites, reign and be the centre of my focus. And I thank God that He's been faithful, being with me every step of the way. Knowing my hurts, pains and regrets and picking me up each time I fall, loving me unconditionally being my source of strength. Thank God too for the things He has been doing. Services each week are so wonderful, basking in His presence, and hearing His word, His calling in our lives and doing a new work in each of our lives each and every week. And its not only in Ignyte but I believe it is happening world wide too, look at the Battlecry in US. (must watch the video, click on the link!)"The youth of the nation today has not forgotten about God and He has not forgotten about us either.""Regardless of how he feels about Christianity, God does love him right where he is."And it is truly amazing what God is doing in the lives of people, how He is working around the world today. And its time for each and everyone of us to rise up and step up and increase our prayer lives and pray along side with the leaders, for the ministry, for our generation.
Don't Get Me Wrong. These are just some emo posts i thought were meaningful. Haha.
Haha Training was fun. School was ok. Let's skip school. XD Er swimming today we had basketball. I CAN'T BELIEVE ALOY, HE BROUGHT WORK!!! I sat next him and SLACKED. LoLx. Haha i guess its ok la. Haha training was kinda tiring actually. LOL The stupid drills for fly. The br stroke was least fun. Fly was 2nd. 1st is BACK!! XD haha. Hope can wake up for school tmr. Very tired now. Eyes...closing............ZZZzzzzzzzzz. (Pssst! BYEBYE!! XD)
9:42 PM
maybe it's true, i can't live without you ♥
Andy :O
Al
Alan :P
Aloysius :)
Alyssa :D
Ariel
Ashneo
Audrey (:
Bertrand
Bran
Cheryl Tan :)
Claire :D
Clement Tan :P
Darrin
Deborah Chua! (:
Delise :D
Ernest Aw
Esther Khoo :D
Jasmine!! (:
Jesselyn
Joelle :D
Jo-Lyn
Justin Seah :P
Justin Siew xD
Joan
Joash
Joshua Kong :D
Katherine
Kai Sheng :P
Kimberlyn
Matthew :P
Melissa :)
Pamela Say
Rachel Lee
Rachel Teh
Shawn Yap :P
Sherwin
Sherlynn :D
Theresa
Timothy Koh
Valerina
Xinping
thanks for the memories ♥
May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 January 2010 February 2010 April 2010 July 2011 December 2011 October 2012
you owe me a cookie ♥
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could have been lovers ♥